Well, it turns out that IntelliJ is not what is really slow, it's Scala. I am kind of a jackass for not having figured that out right away. But this week I was doing some straight Java in IntelliJ, TDD-style, and it was fast, so I did a search on 'IntelliJ scala slow' and hit this StackOverflow thread.
The irony of a language that offers syntactic sugar to lessen typing, that then makes for insufferable compile times is so rife. Oh, please, ye programmers of the future, use any word with me you may choose, but please, NEVER use the word lean, for the gods sake. Let‘s realign the deadliest sins, along the doctrines of lean: surely, there are 2 levels of sin possible:
- ignoring the call to grease the wheel that truly will reap the largest overall benefits, out of unintended ignorance (you can get out your compiler rosary bead for this one)
- inverting the whole Lean system to serve the immediately craven and silly desires of the programmer (to type less, to write in a cool new syntax that makes said aparactchik seem fashionably appointed, etc.)
Sorry, given the diabolical nature of the second one, I am going to have to say exile, banishment, at least a stint at Passages in Malibu, is going to be required. And let‘s not forget, this was the number one finding of metrics studies long before our profession became infused with process experts: engineers tend to devote vast amounts of the effort pie to things that do little to increase overall efficiencies.